I’ve had it with smiley people…

Look, I’ve had it with all you smiley people.  What is it with you, and what sort of  happy juice are you on?  It all started with complete strangers saying to me, “Have a nice day.”  What sort of insincere crap is that?  Like most things I’m sure it started in America and so we’ve caught the disease here too.  Check out chicks  must have the phrase hard-wired into their brain because sure enough, out it pops for every single customer, no matter what sort of impatient, rude, whiney person they are.

I remember a time in this country when we were relatively phrase free and no-one felt the need to smile like a loon all the time.  Now I have to sit and watch absolutely everyone on TV smiling hugely while they are gushing about the virtues of some sanitary pad or toilet drainer/strainer.  Are they showing off their teeth or what, and doesn’t it hurt their cheeks to talk while their mouth is stretched like that almost back to their ears?  It pains me just watching them trying to break their face.

If you look at old photos from early last century you can see that nobody thought it necessary to smile for the camera.  Whoever suggested that we Say cheese should be sentenced to a long stint in a joint that produces curds and whey a long way away.  It’s got so bad that people leer out at you, inviting you to come and see their retirement village, nursing home, transit lounge to the heavenly hereafter and, in spite of the fact that not many men make it to that launching pad, there is always a photo of a really, really smiley man leering out from the page.  And so he should leer – he’s going to be very, very popular very, very soon and will probably die happy if that is his wish.

How do you feel about smiley people? Do they irk you? Or do you enjoy their efforts to be polite and cheerful? Tell us in the comments below…